Fully Alive

As summer quickly disappears and is replaced with the promise of fall I am reminded of the faithfulness of God. Seasons come and they go. People and places come and go. He remains.

I am learning the beauty of just being.
More often than not we, as humans, get so overwhelmed with the planning and preparing of life. Now don't get me wrong there is absolutely nothing wrong with planning or preparing, but what about when there is really nothing to plan or prepare for? Or what if God hasn't given you the next step? Andrew and I both are finding ourselves in this exact place. Sometimes I think God puts us through seasons where we are more receiving from him than pouring out.

Being: to exist
But not simply to just exist, to really live. I am learning to stop and fully live in the moment. Stop right now and go outside. Smell the air? Listen? do you hear anything? What does it mean to be fully alive?
There is so much loaded into that question and so much loaded into the answer. I feel like God is showing me personally that the art of letting go and letting him is what being fully alive is all about. Ultimately, he is doing that within our marriage. I am starting to slow down and enjoy the right now.

Life comes and it goes.

Our pastors spoke on sonship last night. One of them said something so profound: God does not care about anything else, he cares about you. I started to think about it: When I pass away one day, when everything fades away what will matter? Will my dance matter? Will the amount of school that I finish matter? I suddenly got a picture of Jesus wrapping me in his arms and bringing me in close to his face and as I looked into his face Nothing else mattered. He didn't care about the "stuff" he was more interested in me. I'm not saying that our gifts and talents don't matter, but if we don't do anything else with our lives but understanding that we are daughters and sons of God; that is all that will ever matter or be of any importance, in this lifetime and in the next. I think that is the journey I am on. I don't think I have fully understood what it means to be a daughter. Sounds weird right? How hard could it freaking be? So Hard, but so freeing!!

Ahhh so what is new?! We miss family and Colorado so so much. It is actually quite hilarious how back and forth we will go about missing home and such. In those moments of pure "home sickness" God will immediately kiss us. What do I mean by God kissing us? Well you know... when someone comes up and gives you a word of encouragement, you see a rainbow in the midst of the storm, just random acts that God does specifically for you to show you that he cares and loves and knows. I cannot tell you how many "kissing" moments we have had over the last few months. I keep telling Andrew we need to write a book or journal all of the supernatural moments we have had since the start of this journey.

I pray that God would speak his identity, his sonship over each and every one of you. That nothing we do will ever compare to the overwhelming love he has for us just being us. I pray that we would remember to slow down and just be. Teach us Jesus how to be okay with just being. Teach us how to be your sons and daughters. To be fully alive amidst the storms, to be fully alive amidst the joy and fullness of life. I ask for exceedingly more of you.